records sealed

It's finally over... This morning, after waiting two and a half hours for them to get to us, the Elbert County Court officially sealed all records. As I walked out of there for the last time, my mom asked me... "are you finally excited?" (i had struggled to find excitement after the last court appearance where they dropped the charges) I think I made a comment about how glad I was to be out of that building because, truthfully, it was still hard for me to be excited. Don't get me wrong, I'm extremely relieved that the whole thing is finally over, but as I walked out of there I think the hold up was just the complete injustice and unfairness of it all! When I think about how much time and money has gone to fight this accusation for the last SEVEN months, it's hard to be excited about it all because I keep asking... why? What was the purpose of this whole ordeal? Is that fair? Probably not. I should be praising the Lord, but here I am still complaining about having to go through it. I pray that God does use it, and that He'll let me see the fruit of these past few months, but right now that is so hard to see.

"God, change my heart. Open my eyes to your truths, to your paths. Please don't let me stray from your way. As I reflect back, I do see many lessons you have taught me. Thank you for that. Thank you for showing me just how faithful you really are. God, I do thank you that it is finally over. It could have been so much worse and gone on for so much longer. Thank you for the chance to coach again, and for a job that is paying the bills and giving me the time to coach the greatest game ever! I love you!"

three more days

ah, a week away! I just have to make it through three more days and then I'm out... for a WHOLE week! A whole week to hang out with four of the coolest guys on the planet and hopefully, not think about volleyball, Majestic View Worship or Starbucks! What a perfect time for a vacation. When this trip began to take shape I know that God knew what perfect timing this would be. Four days on the road, five in the great state of New Jersey, lots of hilarious stories and awesome time to build stonger friendships... I can't wait!!!!

consumed

volleyball, volleyball, volleyball. That is my life right now. If I'm not coaching or playing the game, I'm thinking about. I think it has become a curse. It has literally been hard to pray, hard to think and hard to live even a few moments without thinking about this game and my upcoming (already here, really) fall. We got back from the mission trip to Juarez a week and a half ago now, and it has been pedal to the medal ever since. I guess in the grand scheme of things, there are a lot worse things that I could be consumed with...

back to square one

Boy, I really don't know how much longer I can handle this... this waiting and trusting and wondering. Yesterday, I found out that the Kiowa band position was being offered to someone else. Last week I went in for an interview with Mr. Luitjens and Mr. Robinson. The interview went great, but at the end I knew the deciding factor was going to be whether they felt they could hire someone who wasn't "highly qualified", meaning someone who wasn't a certified Colorado teacher. Sure enough, that is exactly what Mr. Luitjens told me on the phone yesterday when he called to tell me that they were offering it to someone else. Last week I asked my prayer partner to pray that whatever they decided would be the right decision. I was still struggling to know that teaching at Kiowa was exactly right, but I had decided that if they offered me the position that I WAS going to take it. So, God answered that prayer, but now where am I? Should I reconsider teaching elementary at the charter school, or do I stay at Starbucks for another season and begin working towards my masters at Liberty? I guess I'm right back where I started...